John 19:28-29
After this, when Jesus knew that all was now finished, he
said (in order to fulfill the Scripture), “I am thirsty.” A jar full of sour
wine was standing there. So they
put a sponge full of wine on a branch of hyssop and held it to his mouth.
Here we are, at the foot of the cross. We women, the only ones who braved the
sight of our savior being crucified.
Helpless, powerless, witnesses to the shattering of our world. This man in whom we’ve put all of our
faith, who we would follow to the ends of the Earth, our savior is broken. The heat has made him delirious, his
skin is burnt by the sun, his lungs are wheezing against the pressure of his
ribs. Yet even now, we still hope
that the heavens will open up, that he will perform another miracle and get
down from the cross. Any minute
now because he surely can’t take much more of this suffering. And then, “I am
thirsty.”
Once Jesus utters those words, all of his divine aura disappears. There is nothing left. If our savior, the messiah, were still
in control he would not ask for such a simple, human, thing. With those words, our whole
understanding of Jesus is crushed.
For three years Jesus has been telling us that he is the source of life,
the fountain of living water. We
have believed, we have drunk from that stream, we have been sated. In Jesus we have finally experienced
abundant, steadfast love, that “hesed”
love that the rabbis always talk about.
Society has doubted us women, silenced us, made us into property and
denied our humanity. But not
Jesus. Jesus has accepted us,
empowered us, and affirmed our ministry.
He has given us life, sated our thirst to know we are truly equal
partners in God’s covenant.
And now, that fountain has become a cracked cistern. “I am thirsty.”
Jesus has been transformed from the Messiah into a man. An enlightened man to be sure, but
still just a man. A man who we
love, crying out in pain and bewilderment, “I am thirsty.” Find something!
Anything! Here, a jug of wine,
sour but still wet. Not the good
wine that Jesus made in Canaa, spoiled wine, but still able to provide some
relief to those dry, cracking lips.
How can we get it to him?
Here, a branch of hyssop.
Quick! Dip this sponge in the jar, tie it to the branch, let us give our
beloved teacher the only consolation we can. “I’m thirsty.” We can’t slake his thirst, we can’t relieve
his pain, but we can let him know that he’s not alone. We’re here. To the end.
As we wait with the women for the end, we must ponder these
words, “I am thirsty.” Have we ever heard Jesus speak his needs before? He has never expressed hunger, thirst,
loneliness, pain, or exhaustion.
He has asked for food and drink, but has never expressed that deep
yearning that underpins all suffering.
Surely, he must not have such human needs, God is all-knowing,
ever-present, eternal, all-powerful.
God doesn’t need us. And yet, these words: “I’m thirsty.”
“I am thirsty” is a proclamation of suffering. These women know what it is to
thirst. As Israelites, they
suffered under the oppression of Roman rule. As women, they suffered under the societal codes that
relegated them to mere property. Thirsty for what? For water?
No. If we have
learned anything from the Gospel of
John we know that no one thirsts for plain old water. We thirst for that
which gives us the strength to live in this broken world. That which gives us hope in the midst
of oppression, war, and famine. We
thirst for assurance that we are not alone, that God’s mercy, faithfulness, and
compassion are steadfast. We
thirst for that hesed love, the defining
feature of God’s covenant with us. Jesus was the good news for the women at the
foot of the cross, those marginalized by society, desperately needing to know
that they were not alone.
The suffering, the oppressed, the marginalized are never
alone. Jesus, God incarnate, hangs
on the cross proving once and for all whose side God is on. This is the good news, that Jesus
suffers and dies with us. But we
have to push further if we are to witness the transformation taking place. It
must have been so unsettling for the women, so frightening, to see Jesus enter
that space that they had occupied for so long. Jesus was strong, Jesus was persistent, Jesus was
powerful. Imagine, they had so
recently come into their own and felt the liberating power of God’s favor. This is their teacher, who affirmed
their own power and wisdom, he is their guiding star, their fountain of justice
and righteousness, their friend.
Hanging on the cross, broken, and empty. “I am thirsty.”
With these words, Jesus turns the tables once again, turns
the world upside down and reverses the roles that these women are familiar
with. They’ve traded places. These
women, the marginalized in society, they understand suffering, they recognize
it in Jesus and they rush to meet him in that suffering to offer love and
comfort that only they can. No, they couldn’t give him water, but Jesus didn’t
ask for water. Jesus needed that
final human connection, the knowledge that he was loved and that he was not
alone. The women reach deep within
themselves and find that hesed love and
offer it back to him. Sour wine on
hyssop? No. Mercy, compassion, faithfulness, living
water.
Like always, it is the women who are the first to
understand, the first to hear the good news. Even here. Even
now. Only here, and only now could
they understand what he had been telling them for three years. He told the Samaritan woman that “the
water that I will give will become in you a spring of water gushing up to
eternal life.” He told the crowds
in Jerusalem “let the one who believes in me drink, and out of the believer’s
heart shall flow rivers of living water.” Like so many of Jesus’ teachings, these
words were misinterpreted and misremembered. It’s not only Jesus who is a fountain of living water, we
are too. And that’s what the women
at the foot of the cross realized.
Jesus didn’t cry out for water, he was crying out for the same thing
those women had cried out for, what we all are thirsty for: affirmation of hesed love.
The three women gave Jesus more than temporary relief from a
parched mouth. They gave him the
strength to die. And he had to
die. I don’t know why, I’m not
sure anyone really does. Whether
it was to forgive our sins, to demonstrate the power of the covenant, to truly
experience the depth of human pain and suffering, to liberate us from
oppression, or all of these things together, Jesus had to die. And yet he couldn’t do it without
us. This ultimate manifestation of
God’s grace, love, and faithfulness, this ultimate affirmation and sealing of
the covenant, could not happen without the assurance that Jesus was not alone,
that he was loved. The women
didn’t give Jesus sour wine on hyssop.
With that last physical connection, that last act of solidarity and
love, they gave him living water. And it is through that hesed love, made manifest by the women at the cross, that
salvation is achieved. Jesus on the cross calls to the fountains of living
water that we hold in our hearts and souls, the living water that saves the
world.